Arts & Culture
Tables turn on notorious communication professor/ STV star Bill Davidson
The Pointless
djigg546@uwsp.edu
A ground-breaking new reality series from the makers of Trivia Man, Down for the Count and Point of View that pits professors against the trials and tribulations of life in residence halls is receiving rave reviews from the nine people that actually watch Student TV.
“True Life: My professor ate my ramen” premiered on March 15 to an initial audience of four, which has since increased by 25 percent every week.
The series stars Bill Davidson, professor of the infamous communication 101 course. In the show, Davidson is relegated to a fourth floor residence in Hyer Hall, where he must live, work and sleep.
“We put him in Hyer because it’s going to be demolished anyway,” said producer John Sonville. “We figured it wouldn’t matter how much harm he caused.”
After writing “Communication,” his premier work on college-level public speaking classes, he went on to write many subsequent sequels, including “How to ruin a freshman’s first year,” “When to actually read my textbooks” and his number one bestseller, “How to pass the hardest final ever.”
“After my enormous success in failing freshmen, I think that I could handle anything that a dorm room could throw at me,” said Davidson.
The first episode of the show proved his theory wrong.
“I just happened to sit on my remote and it flipped to channel 98,” said UW-SP junior Richard Harding. “The show was hysterical and I wish I still lived in the residence halls so I could partake in the revenge. That man ruined my first semester of college. I had such a bright outlook on life. Now it is bleak, musty and damp. Perhaps ‘True Life’ will brighten my days.”
Multiple students, hoping to air grievances against him, poured water under his door, put toothpaste on his doorknob and stole his clothes while in the shower. Also, he has developed a foot fungus, as he does not wear shower shoes.
Davidson also has to make the Debot Dining Center his premier source of food. Given his propensity for irregularity, his dining options are taking a toll on his digestive system.
His roommate is also posing a number of problems. With a penchant for partying, Steve McQueen, the surprise guest on the show, is keeping Davidson up at night while distracting him with multiple viewings of pornography throughout the day.
Since the airing of the show, grades in communication 101 have increased 40 percent due to Davidson’s inability to sleep at night and his distractions while in his room during the day.
“Perhaps I’ve made a mistake by partaking of this show,” said Davidson. “The severe emotional damage it’s causing me is on par with the time I walked in on my parents.”
“True Life: My professor ate my ramen” can be seen on STV channel 8, Thursdays at 9:30 p.m.
This article was written for “The Pointless” - The Pointer’s April Fools Day alter ego
