Pointlife
JusTen ways to drive your roommate insane
The Pointer
10. Set up a volleyball net. Constantly spike the ball at your roommate.
9. Go to the involvement fair and sign your roommate up for everything.
8. Buy a plant. Talk to it more than you talk to your roommate. In fact, talk to your plant about your roommate while he or she’s in the room.
7. Set up a video camera aimed at your roommate’s bed. If asked what you’re doing, just say, “research.”
6. Speak to them only with flashcards. Provide them with a set.
5. Move everything to one side of the room. When your roommate enters, pretend to be measuring out the room with great concern. Explain that you’re building a shark tank.
4. Wear a cape. Stand in front of a window for about an hour every day. Then, one day, when your roommate is gone, go outside and lie down beneath the window, pretending to be injured, and wait for your roommate to return.
3. Whenever your roommate leaves, put a glass of water right by the door so that they knock it over when they return. Do this every single time.
2. Play Christmas music all year long.
1. Get a tarantula or snake and keep it in a container in the open. Explain that it will only be for a few days. Get rid of the tarantula or snake when your roommate is out but leave the empty container. If your roommate asks anything just say, “I’m sure he’ll turn up somewhere.”
